Self-acceptance refers to how much of ourselves we can accept and embrace.
- Can I accept my insecurities? Can I accept my mistakes?
The broader our embrace of ourselves can be, the more we can treat ourselves with loving-kindness, understanding, and compassion.
- We need this deep level of acceptance so we can feel secure in who we are as we venture out into the world, take risks, learn from our experiences, and become resilient.
- This is how we become competent in the world. Then our self-esteem can grow as it should, based on our accomplishments and successes.
Our ability to accept ourselves is an important part of our inner psychological foundation. It affects small day-to-day ways of behaving as well as major life decisions.
- It’s reflected in how we relate to others and how we expect them to treat us.
- Our acceptance of ourselves also determines our vision for ourselves now and in the future.
- It can influence our hopes and dreams for our whole lifetime.
Unfortunately, self-acceptance is a struggle for most of us in western culture. Our culture is becoming progressively consumed with unrealistic expectations and standards for what we’re supposed to look like, what we have to accomplish, and what we need to possess. We cannot afford to let these extreme cultural values influence our inner capacity to accept ourselves.
- One of the most common ways our self-acceptance of our bodies is compromised is by our near-constant exposure to the mass media, including TV, magazines, movies, and so forth.
- Men and women are unhappy with their bodies than ever before.
- We have to learn that we are our bodies. Our bodies are not primarily objects to be judged and evaluated, but expressions of our uniqueness.
- Our ability to accept ourselves as we are comes from a much deeper place inside ourselves than even a positive body image
- Have an empowered sense of ease with our whole selves, not just our physical bodies.
Re-source: Reflections
Self-acceptance implies a courageously honest self-confrontation: Who am I? What can I do? And where do I want to go in life?
We reflect on ourselves with a vision based on our deepest values, independent of the external cultural media machine.
- Remember, we don’t have to like every single thing about who we are or what we can do.
- We just have to accept ourselves in order to create the necessary condition for future self-development.
Perhaps the biggest impediment to self-acceptance is the inner critic
- Our internal tape recorder that is constantly repeating self-defeating statements.
- This inner critic can be so loud and continuous that people assume it’s their true voice and what it says reflects who they really are. IT’S NOT.
- The inner critic is merely one aspect of the psyche, definitely not the whole person.
- However, If it takes up too much psychological space, it can actually impact a person’s life, discouraging them from exploring opportunities, learning new things, or accepting themselves as they are.
- many times our personal tape recorder is working overtime with messages like, “You’ll never pull this off. You can’t handle this. You’ve always been a failure. You’re not good enough. You’ll never make the team.”
Just the practice of writing down our self-talk gives us a sense of objectivity and master over our self-criticism. Don’t let those old thoughts interfere in your life now.
- Get better at recognizing the negative messages as they arise.
- Do not resist or try to stop the negative tapes. Accept them and recognize that they represent a small part of who we were, and that our whole selves are far more vast and magnificent.
craving and resource from “20 Minute Retreats” by Rachel Harris