ICRAVE Making Stress My Friend

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Is it possible that how we think about and interact with stress can help us avoid some of the consequences we don’t want?

  • Maybe there is something good about stress worth embracing so that your mindset could help you harness some of your personal strengths.
    • to help you harness the strength in your community.
  • Maybe we can get some positive outcomes we don’t usually associate with stress.

Stress is a paradox. Stress is not something that we often get to choose

  • If we had a wish list, we couldn’t say “I want this much stress, and this type of stress.”

The Stress Mindset Effect

  • There are ways of thinking about stress that can make your body’s response to stress healthier.
  • That can change what happens in your brain in moments of stress that make you braver, more resilient, and/or more willing to accept help from others.
  • And these mindsets basically change the trajectory of how stress affects you.

There is no such thing as good stress or bad stress. That is a big misconception around stress.

  • Forget good stress bad stress, because it sets us up to think that we’re experiencing what all of us will instinctively say we didn’t want – the “bad stress” – and that’s the real stress for most of us.
  • Most of us don’t get to choose how stressful our lives are, and how stressful the world is.
  • Life can be difficult, and that can be good or bad.

Stress is what arises in you when something that you care about is at stake

  • It’s your thoughts
  • It’s your emotions
  • It’s your biology
  • It’s the stress hormones
  • It’s the adrenaline
  • It’s your desire to reach out to others
  • It’s sometimes a sense of outrage and anger
  • It’s all the stuff that emerges to help you meet a moment that matters

Image result for stress response

Re-source: Response

a reaction to something : an excitation of a nerve impulse caused by a change or event : a physical reaction to a specific stimulus or situation

In moments of stress some of our instincts are going to be healthy and helpful, and others are not. There’s a lot of different ways to be good at stress, and that’s what we should focus on.

  • Rather than stress being good or bad, it’s about learning more about your stress responses.
  • With the repertoire that’s available to you, how do you get good at stress so that you can tell in a moment of stress…
    • “Is this a moment that requires slowing down and going within?”
    • “Is this a moment that requires being vulnerable and asking for help?”
    • “Is this a moment that requires ignoring everything else and rising to the challenge because it’s an emergency and i need that adrenaline to do it?”

Human nature has a lot of instincts that are destructive and harmful and human nature has a lot of instincts that are beautiful and wonderful.

  • Our greatness and aspiration can be to make peace with that truth, and being able to make choices that bring out in ourselves and other people the good instincts.  
    • That’s what we can strive for.

craving and resource from “The Secret To Making Stress Your Friend” by Kelly McGonigal with Lewis Howes